Finding Creativity Through Pain


How I stayed encouraged through a significant loss. This last year has been a roller coaster ride for many of us. Covid has changed our perspective, interactions, and how we show love towards others in the blink of an eye. Now, don't get me wrong there were some beautiful experiences that covid taught too; being present is one of the most important things that I took away. In this frame of time, traveling and visiting family and friends was a luxury that many could not afford to make, some because of financial reasons, but mostly because of the risk that doing so would place family members in danger. So like many, I went a long time before I had time to see my mom in person again. Back in March 2021, I made the voyage to visit my family on a surprise trip. At this time, many of my loved ones received their vaccine shots and all was well. The trip was amazing. As close to perfect, I could have imagined. So we had created much love and memories that visit. I was full, overflowing with joy as I returned to LA. Little did I know that unexpectedly a few weeks later I would lose my mom suddenly at the young age of 52. 

In dealing with that loss and all that comes with preparing a parent to leave this earth, one thing I battled with (among other things) was what happens next for my life? I know many of you reading this may not have met me in person yet, but much of my essence, my personality, and my creativity were inspired and passed down from my mom.

 So losing someone who has been one of my biggest cheerleaders suddenly caused me to step back and wonder what does moving forward looks like for me? How do I design through all this pain? I harbored these questions for some time. I prayed I would find peace and understanding to go on. Since my return to LA after this troublesome time, the first thing I had to do was to figure out a new routine. Finding purpose in my studio was hard at first. Picking up where I left off and getting behind the sewing machine took much encouragement. Some days I cried, some days it felt ”normal” again and the designs would shoot out my mind. Through all of it, however, I felt different. I could count on late night calls from my mom as I worked in the studio learning about her day at work, or what she cooked for the day, or amazing ideas she just cared to share. Now that I don't have those experiences to share with her, I'm inspired even more to make this journey worthwhile. I can't wait to tell her about this amazing journey that I am on, I know she would love to hear. So every day I enter my studio, I let the dress forms know, ” we have an audience of angels watching us, so let's get creative and give them something to be proud of.” Encouraging men and women to shop with a new mindset is why I'm here. Teaching you to shop for clothes designed for your body, not the other way around, is my purpose. And I mean why not do it, I mean you deserve it !!